Having lost my grandma and one of my cats this summer has made me do a lot of thinking. And feeling. A thought led me back to that time in junior high when I came across Anne Frank's Diary. She was a teen during one of the darkest times in human history. She was loved by her family, but her value was overlooked by others, her life snuffed out without a second thought. Her diary shows how much of a gem she was. But aren't we all valuable? Aren't we all gems? The feeling or even fear of not being valued can bring about depression.
Now when you think of a gem, you're probably thinking diamonds, emeralds, rubies. Don't we all admire their beauty and if we own one, don't we take good care of it? We keep them safe, but we love to show them off. What about our kids? Our spouses? Our parents? Yes, even our new vehicle can be a source of pride.
The fear of not being valued, of others not seeing the gem I am, still haunts me from time to time. I sometimes wonder if I'm going to be that abandoned house on the hill, with no one wanting to take care of me when I need it, to value my wisdom, or take pleasure in my company. I fear being the tree in Shel Silverstein's "The Giving Tree" but where the boy never returns. If you take the God-and-Humankind relationship of that book, I wonder if this depressed feeling of not being valued is what God feels sometimes.
As a writer, I fear those rejection letters. It would feel the same as not being valued, not being seen as a gem. I'd have a big battle to get over it and move on. Still, I continue to write when I can, hoping someday someone sees the gem I am.
Oh, how I long to tell you the stories hidden inside of me. I've much to share! All the true stories from my life and those past down to me and the ones I made up, too. I'll make you laugh. I'll make you cry. I'll open your eyes to things you may not have noticed before. Come. Have a seat. Yes?
Sadly, that house in Zorn, Texas has been demolished. The Studebaker tow truck in Kyle, Texas has disappeared. My cat? We buried her in the backyard under the shade of two trees. Surely, more people than me will remember and respect the gem they were.
Of course, I welcome comments, thoughts, suggestions. Do you also have the fascination with abandoned places and things?